When it comes to a sexuality there is a lot that can go wrong and it tends to be hidden behind closed doors. Fret not, the things you may be experiencing are common and are sometimes considered normal. If you experience any of these issues, be open and talk about it with your partner and doctor. They can sometimes be hard to discuss but you should not be ashamed of your sexuality or lack of. Here are some of the five common sexual problems for men and women.
Lack of Libido
With all the things you have to deal with throughout the day; family, school, and work, it is not always easy to have a desire or drive to have sex. One contributing factor to lack of libido is fatigue. This is especially true if you are caring for young children or are sick or recovering from surgery or child birth. Along with the fatigue from child birth or pregnancy comes a hand full of other reasons such as breast feeding, anxiety or postpartum depression. You may also be experiencing self-esteem issues and a poor body image; that doesn’t help in the case or your libido. There are also lots of non-sexual medical reasons to why you may be experiencing a lack of libido. Some of them include but are not limited to cancer, diabetes, high blood pressure and coronary artery and neurological diseases. If you are taking medications for anything they may also be the cause for a lagging libido. Some notorious medications are anti-depressants and anti-seizure medication. If you feel like this may be a reason for you, get with your doctor to see what they make recommend. While most of these causes are medical there are a few that are non-medical. For example, if you smoke it can decrease your blood flow and in return will make it much harder for you to feel aroused. Another notorious libido killer is drinking too much alcohol. One glass of wine may make you feel promiscuous and excited but if you drink too much it can inhibit your ability. If you do not spontaneously think about sex, don’t worry. Some women do not develop a desire until after they are already sexually aroused. Either way, this is not essential to having a great sex life, but it is a common problem.
Arousal is a sense of sexual pleasure or satisfaction. This usually occurs during foreplay before intercourse; arousal will increases blood flow, heart rate, and increases lubrication in the genitals. If you are having trouble with arousal, this can be extremely frustrating and discouraging. Try spicing up your sex life with toys or role playing.
Lack of satisfaction
Next would be lack of satisfaction, and that includes not feeling satisfied after or during sex; sometimes with or without orgasms. This can occur when your mind is on another topic or if you are extremely stressed. When engaging in intercourse with your partner, try focusing on them and staying in the moment.
Lack of lubrication
Last but not least, is lack of lubrication. This can happen for many reasons; some may be medical and some because you may not feel aroused. Lubricant sometimes helps with this, but consulting with your doctor would also be a good option.
According to Planned Parenthood as many as 80% of women have trouble reaching an orgasm through just vaginal intercourse. The causes can sometimes be that you may not be stimulated enough to efficiently reach an orgasm. Try speaking to your partner about the things you like in bed. Sometimes you or your partner may feel insecure about your sexual performance so speaking openly about this would benefit your sex life. If you are having trouble with orgasm’s, doctors recommend clitoral stimulation or extra lubrication. If your partner is having problems orgasming there might be some under lining issues that they may both feel comfortable speaking about just yet such as depression, fear of sex, or a traumatic sexual experience. Instead of getting frustrated try being gentle with your partner or possibly doing therapy or couples counseling together to make you or your partner feel a little more comfortable in a natural environment.
So what are some of the causes of these 5 common sexual problems? The root can be anywhere from menopause, vaginal and or pelvic pain, or an undiagnosed medical issue. These problems can sometimes affect your personal well-being and cause relationship issues. There are several ways to treat these problems, some simpler treatments include; managing stress and relationship issues, treating vaginal dryness and painful sex, and in some instances receiving medical care and medications. If you have any of these issues, try visiting with a gynecologist regularly. Make an appointment to be diagnosed or looked over. Also try speaking with your partner, sometimes that’s all it takes to have a better relationship and sex life.